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Fata Narrat: Short Stories

Draft of Garden Awakening

Title: The Forgotten Garden

She had returned to her childhood home after years of absence. The house was as she remembered-wooden shutters creaking, cobwebs hanging from the corners. But what greeted her outside was something unexpected-a lush garden filled with vibrant colors and fragrant flowers. Her heart skipped a beat, a memory surfaced: her grandmother had tended to it with great care.

As she stepped into the garden, she saw a statue of a small girl holding an oversized flower, looking just like her. A sudden wave of nostalgia overwhelmed her. She began to recall stories her grandmother used to tell about magic hidden in every petal and leaf. The air was thick with the scent of jasmine, and she couldn't resist picking a single flower, pressing it against her cheek.

Her fingers brushed against a small note tucked behind the blossom. Curious, she unfolded it-'The magic lies not in the garden but within you.' A chill ran down her spine as she realized the message was from herself, written years ago when she was on the brink of leaving forever.


Draft Review of Garden Awakening

The draft story, titled 'The Forgotten Garden', effectively captures a sense of nostalgia and mystery. However, there are areas where the narrative can be tightened and clarified for better flow and coherence. For instance, the statue scene could be more impactful by removing redundant elements or adding depth to the description. Additionally, the sudden appearance of the note might feel jarring without proper setup. Here's a suggestion: Integrate the note discovery into a natural context that aligns with her emotional journey. Ensure the character's actions and thoughts reflect her growing realization about herself. This would make the ending more satisfying and cohesive.