Draft of Elian's Dragon Wish
In the enchanted forest of Eldoria, where magic whispered through the leaves and secrets hid in every shadow, there lived a humble woodcutter named Elian. With a heart as pure as the snow that covered the highest peaks, Elian had heard tales of a legendary treasure hidden deep within the forest-rumored to be guarded by an ancient dragon. Driven by curiosity and a spirit of adventure, he decided to embark on this perilous quest.
Elian prepared himself with a sturdy axe, a map he had found in his grandfather's attic, and a small bag of provisions. As dawn broke, he set out into the dense woods, the air thick with the scent of pine and mystery. The forest seemed to shift and whisper around him, as if wary of this intruder who dared to disturb its secrets.
Days turned into weeks, and Elian faced countless challenges-ravens that spoke in riddles, rivers that tried to drown him, and forests that grew darker with each step. But his determination never wavered. One night, under the light of a full moon, he stumbled upon an ancient stone altar hidden beneath the roots of a giant oak. Carved into its surface was the fateful map.
Following the cryptic symbols, Elian soon arrived at the dragon's lair-a cavern filled with treasure beyond his wildest dreams. The ancient guardian lay asleep, its scales shimmering in the dim light. With trembling hands, Elian placed a small token he had brought-his grandfather's old silver whistle-and woke the beast.
The dragon awoke to find a stranger before it and, much to Elian's surprise, spoke with a voice like rushing water. 'Elian,' it said, 'you have proven yourself worthy of this treasure.' The dragon granted him a boon, restoring the health of his village after years of sickness. Thus, the adventure ended not in battle but in friendship, as Elian returned home with tales of his encounter and a heart full of gratitude.
Draft Review of Elian's Dragon Wish
The draft has good potential, but it could benefit from some tightening and elaboration. Here are my suggestions:
1. Consider trimming the narrative to stay within the word limit.
2. Add more vivid descriptions of the forest and dragon's lair to enhance the fantastical feel.
3. Clarify Elian's internal thoughts or feelings to deepen his character development.
4. Ensure dialogue sounds natural, especially when spoken by the dragon.
5. Provide a clear resolution for any subplots or side quests introduced.